Amazon Jungle WOD

I read a story of men in the Amazon fighting the odds and some voracious adversaries to gather some elusive medication from the top of the tallest trees called the Kapok.
Urban legend or not, definitely worthy of a WOD. To make such a workout real, I had to add contribution to some amazing people I found on Kiva, the great micro-lending organization.
Amazon Jungle WOD
– row up the river – [1000m row]
– run from the predators of the river into the jungle – [800m run]
– fight off the monster spiders – [30 kettlebell swings @ 50lbs]
– climb up and down the spiky Kapok tree – [30 pullups and 1 muscle-up]
– smash the attacking coral snakes – [30 slam balls @ 20lbs]
– wrestle with the Chief of the Tree Protector Tribe – [30 thrusters @ 45lbs]
– run back to the river – [800m run]
– row back to the village hospital – [1000m row]
( + 1 burpee penalty for every 10 seconds over 30 minutes)
– finally, deliver the medicine – [lend on Kiva]
[27:20]